You came all the way to China but most of your friends are English speaking expats. The Chinese friends you have managed to make are either your students or people who wish they were your students. You eat at the same place every day, usually a Western cafe, and when you go out at night you usually end up drinking Gin and Tonics with a bunch of Italians, Slovenians and Australians. You might not live in an expat compound, but your neighbourhood is full of foreigners just the same. If you find yourself wondering how it is that you live in China but are still not at all in touch with the local culture, here are six tips that might help you “integrate” into Chinese society.

1) Learn the local lingo

Learning to speak the language doesn’t just stop at Mandarin. Part of what makes the Chinese language unique is the fact that there are hundreds, even thousands, of local dialects spoken all over China. While Mandarin is of course the lingua franca throughout China, learning a bit of the local dialect spoken where you are can help you make great inroads into the local culture. Learn how to haggle with vendors in Changsha-hua or tell a cabbie your address in Kunminghua and you’re bound to make instant friends. What’s more, Chinese culture is extremely regionalist, and people closely identify with their hometowns and home language. Speaking a bit of the local dialect sends the message that you’re an insider, not just a guest passing through, and that you care enough about your adopted home to want to fit in with the locals.

2) Eat like a local

Skip the cafes and big restaurants and try eating at some local dives, the hole-in-the-wall places where you can still get a good meal for under 20 RMB. If you make a certain place your regular haunt, you’re bound to become friendly with the “laoban” (boss) and you’ll probably start to recognize other regulars as well. Not only do the small back-alley places have some of the best food in town, the throngs of tourists tend to avoid them because of hygiene concerns. However, if a place has a regular crowd of people eating there, you generally do not have to worry about cleanliness. Claiming a small hole in the wall eatery as “yours,” a place where you can greet the boss by name and the staff knows just what you’re going to order, can help you feel like you’re really a part of a community.

3) Travel like a local

Next time you’re planning a vacation, skip the plane tickets and travel by train. Trains are still the preferred method of travel in China, and the ever frugal Chinese often opt for the cheapest seats possible. Everyone should, at least once, try taking a long distance journey on a hard seat in China. It may be uncomfortable, but it’ll be the trip of a lifetime, and you’re sure to emerge with stories to tell. While soft sleeper is nice and comfortable, on a hard seat, sharing a table with a group of complete strangers, you will have a truly Chinese travel experience. Another travel experience not to be missed is the sleeper bus. While the sleeper bus is not really the place for making friends, no cultural immersion could be complete without a sleeper bus journey. Once you’ve braved the long distance hard seat and the sleeper bus you’ll have the confidence to handle just about any sort of travel China might throw at you and you’ll start to feel like you’re really getting the hang of this “China thing.”